Ivwas in early 20’s, didn’t have any good churches in my small neighborhood, walking distance, no car, newer Christian but didn’t belong to a church. The churches in my neighborhood didn’t preach the gospel, also Catholic church I was against this false religion, other churches didn’t speak out against Catholicism . For some reason I wanted to go to a Baptist church, it seemed like Baptist churches preached the gospel and were vocal about it. I found out about this church that was Baptist and had a bus ministry to pick people up. I asked bus captain if they preached the gospel and if they believed Roman Catholicism was Christian, he said no, I liked that since most churches seemed to either think it was Christian or were afraid to speak out against it. I started going there. I’m also shy. Some things I heard from them I wasn’t sure about like they were against all contemporary Christian music, they said KJV Bible was only good version, at the time it seemed like I was only woman wearing slacks.  They spoke out against cults, world religions including Catholic and things like prosperity gospel, name it claim it, speaking in tongues, slain in spirit so I thought that was great but some people there seemed self-righteous, I felt I didn’t fit in but not sure if I’m right or just because I’m shy.  I know this probably sounds vain but I gained weight and didn’t feel comfortable wearing dresses or skirts, but I wasn’t allowed to volunteer because of dress code.  I remember making holiday bags of candy and small toys for kids on church bus and putting tracts in them. One time I forgot to order tracts and went to Christian bookstore and bought kids tracts, very simple message and a few Bible verses but not King James. One of the adult helpers on bus must have looked through a bag a read tract, acted like he didn’t but asked me if it was KJV, he seemed accusing, made me feel like a criminal.   It just feels sometimes like some of these Christians forget Grace, like they want to find everyone else’s sin but their own. I mean I’m not condoning sin or saying that there aren’t times when you may confront someone about their son but some seem so self-righteous it’s not loving. They know Bible scripture but don’t seem to be very loving.


Once on the church bus years ago there was a little girl who was so excited to tell bus captain about her birthday and what she did at her birthday party. She told him her parents had a party at the movie theater, he looked directly at her,behind his head and said “That’s Ashame” he embarrassed her. I’m not saying going to a secular movie is good but maybe her and her parents aren’t saved  That just seemed like a turn off,very holier than thou.  Once a boy and his sister went to event at church, told bus captain they would be on bus Sunday to church, the sister didn’t go, the bus captain was upset, seemed angry, disappointed and started asking the brother why she didn’t come, told him she promised and a promise is a promise, the bus captain clearly embarrassed and angered the brother. He didn’t come back to church after that. Is it a coincidence?

Years ago a young girl was wearing a white blouse to church, one of the women upstairs told her it needed I guess a camisole under it, I don’t think it was see through. My niece’s son went to church with my mother, I don’t know if he has a suit but he wore a white button down shirt and sweatpants to church, someone up in kids room told my mother he needed to wear dress pants next time he came to church. I remember the girls weren’t supposed to to wear sleeveless dresses either, mind you, the sleeve holes under their armpits weren’t hanging low or a side breast or bra visible at all when they lifted up an arm.   The men have to have short hair to volunteer. I guess if a woman is wearing modest slacks and blouse that isn’t good enough to work at church,byoy have to have a skirt or dress.  I’m not saying I’d wear dirty clothes to church but my clothes are modest.  My one from won’t go to church or even do work at church printing tracts without me a skirt, shell wear jeans in her house or at work but it’s a sin I guess at church,bodies God not see the jeans at home?  Finding a Biblical but loving church is hard plus I work Sundays, I’ll have my hours cut if I don’t so that doesn’t help.