This concerns more of what has happened with my daughter and how our church decides to discipline those who do not abide by their rules, which really have become a double standard depending on your name and/or monetary standing within the church. I’ve found this to be true of most of the churches in our churches “camp”.
- There was a young lady whose family left an extremely legalistic church to come to ours and she was welcomed in by most of the girls in the youth group. That is, until she started drifting away and getting involved lightly in alcohol and some drugs. Since my daughter had become close to her I told her to be a friend to her, continue to include her when her and her friends had get togethers or went out together, but not to hang out with her at the places she would go with her new friends from school. My daughter continued to try and include her and invite her to our home on many occasions and go to her home as well which gave us opportunity to become friends with her family. The other girls, however, did not want to include her and were told by pastoral staff to stay away and not have anything to do with her because of her sin. During this time, the girls dad died suddenly from Covid and my family made sure we were there for her mom and her and her brother. We were practically the only ones in the church doing anything to help and be an encouragement as none of the other families who called the dad “friend” would do anything. As a result, we all grew close to the girl and her mom and brother. We started noticing other families not talking to as much in the process. A few months later, the girl was able to purchase a vehicle using some of the money from her dad’s life insurance and was excited to show it off and took a picture with my daughter. Apparently, my daughter’s skirt was pulled up too high(which could only be seen by zooming in) in the pic and was taken to the Pastor and she was removed “indefinitely” from a singing group she was in as a result. This was her second warning because of another pic she posted of her in short shorts on the beach during vacation. Not to mention that my parental authority was completely bypassed during all of this(I work swing shifts and was not at church when the pic was taken) and I knew nothing until I get to church on a Sunday morning to find out she had been punished. By the way, my daughter was 19 at the time and not in the youth group, but still in my home. She eventually got reinstated, but not without having FB and Insta police watching and told they were watching. There’s more issues since then and I have tons of other stories I could share, but would probably need to wait until I am actually out. I have tons such as my oldest son and his friend basically got called out from the pulpit because the Pastor found out they listen to your podcast. I have overheard a lot of things in recent years from being around the church office that would blow your mind.
- Sorry for the length, but you can paraphrase the story if you use it(which might be preferable since it’s very specific and if they listen they will know. I’m sure JC won’t mind paraphrasing 😁
I’m an outsider to this world BUT this is utterly bizarre and creepy. RUN. DO not look back.
I can relate to your story. I hope and pray that your daughter continues to follows Jesus. It was stuff like that that has caused my daughters to walk away from the faith. If you are a parent protect your children from this kind of garbage and don’t be afraid what others will think. Your family is your first ministry!!!!!